Write down your worries, then set them aside

Worries cycle because your mind keeps rehearsing them to make sure they are not forgotten. To write down your worries is to hand that job to paper, which is a considerably more reliable storage system. The setting aside is the second half and the part that actually requires deciding to do it.

Why write down your worries, then set them aside is worth an hour

Unresolved concerns occupy attention persistently, and externalising them onto a list appears to reduce that load. Sorting into actionable and not-actionable then does something separate: the actionable ones get a next step, which converts anxiety into a task, and the rest are explicitly acknowledged as things you cannot act on, which is a different and calmer relationship to them.

How to write down your worries, then set them aside step by step

1. 1

   Write every worry down

   Unfiltered, including the trivial and the irrational. Getting them out of your head is the first mechanism.

2. 2

   Mark each as actionable or not

   Two columns. Most people find the second column considerably longer than expected.

3. 3

   Give the actionable ones one next step

   One small step, not a solution. A worry with a next step attached is a task rather than a worry.

4. 4

   Acknowledge the rest explicitly

   Write down that you cannot act on these now. Naming the fact is what allows the setting aside.

5. 5

   Close the notebook and put it away

   Physically. Out of sight, in a drawer. The physical act of closing it matters more than it seems.

Tips to get more out of it

• Do it earlier in the evening rather than at bedtime, so the writing does not become the thing keeping you awake.
• Keep a scheduled worry time, perhaps fifteen minutes daily. It gives circling thoughts a legitimate slot to wait for.
• If worry is persistent and affecting sleep or daily function, speak to a doctor rather than managing it alone.

Ways to mix it up

If the list is overwhelming, restrict it to what is worrying you this week rather than everything. If a particular worry keeps returning after the exercise, write out the worst case and what you would actually do; specificity usually shrinks it.

Write down your worries, then set them aside: frequently asked questions